Sorry, I see that I have been doing this all wrong.  Don’t say I don’t learn.  I have now read every other food blog and I see what I should be doing.  Lets start again.

I made a salad.

First I took an iceberg lettuce.  I broke it up, washing the fragments, carefully removing slugs and returning them to the wild.  (Tip – don’t use soap.)

 

 

 

 

I sliced some carrots with my knife.  It hurt them more than it hurt me.

I cut up some capsicums.

I sliced some lebanese cucumbers.

I mixed them together.  (Technical term – tossed.)

I threw in some coloured cocktail onions  (mmm, food dye), just for a change.

I made my own dressing with lemon and vinegar and the blood of a third world child*.  (*No I didn’t but I don’t have any of the exotic herbs everyone else refers to and I felt left out.)

I opened a tin of sliced beetroot and served it separately.Communist Superman only uses Australian Beetroot slices

I took lots of pictures of my shitty salad but they did not turn out well.  However, that would not stop me adding them if I knew how.

 

I drank half a bottle of vodka later and vomited everywhere*.  That is the picture I really wanted to add.  (*No I didn’t.  I have never drunk vodka again since a fateful night with a very large Russian when I was young and hadn’t learned I was not invincible.  I learned otherwise two hours later.)

Bugger, I didn’t use macaroni.  Everybody else uses macaroni.

Yummo, it was nearly as good as germ sausages, and it tasted just like chicken.  (Must check microbes – see “Aboot”.)

Isn’t the internet wonderful?

********

“your writing isn’t nearly as “creative” as you think it is”

is that better?

Coming soon – spaghetti from a tin – ON TOAST!!

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Comments
  1. Aisha says:

    If somebody tells ya “ur writing isnt creative” just tell them “ur reading isnt creative enough.” LOL haha

    I loved reading your blog and I loved the humor you added. I would have loved to see the picture of your end result salad 😛 😛 😛

  2. kalima123 says:

    The greatest asset any of us has is a good sense of humor and the ability to laugh at ourselves. Your blog is great – as is your writing. Don’t let one person’s opinion get you down. It’s just one person. Keep up the great work!

  3. […] fear, I have the recipe for an excellent and nutritious salad here.  And for dessert, given them American chocolate.  It tastes so bad they’ll think it is a […]

  4. […] Until then, at least we have salad. […]

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